钱钟书先生的q篇散文说的是窗子,但是其用意绝不仅仅是说说H子而已Q而是要以H子来比ȝzR比Mh生。从语言上看Q《窗》gl了一贯的钱派手法Q用词^实、普通,没有长句Q没有什么复杂结构,非常从容地叙q、说理,却又紧紧地扣住了主题。这L(fng)特点对翻译构成的隑ֺ不言而喻Q翻译中应当时时充分考虑上述特点Q尽量在译文中体现出来。
一、逐句分析Q?
H?
Random Thoughts on the Window Q题目中的这个窗字,包含的意思较Z富,使h有多U联惻I因此译成Random Thoughts on the Window.Q
又是春天
It is spring again
中文是无dQ英文没有这L(fng)句子l构Q因此用It is……句型。原文里“又”用在句首,但是英文如果也把again攑֜句首Q这个词太H出Q分量太重了。所以again一词在译文中放在句末和原文“又”放在句首分量相当?
H子可以常开?
and the window can be left open as often as one would like
用定冠词the 加单数名词window来代表所有的H子。英语里表示“全部”可以有几种Ҏ(gu)Q?Q复数名词,2Q不定冠词a/an+名词Q?Q定冠词+名词。这里就是用的第三种Q更侧重其一致性。“常开”不能译成can open often或can be opened often.因ؓ(f)原文是从人的角度说的Qh们什么时候想开H都行,所以用了one would likeq样的说法?
春天从窗外进?
As spring comes in through the windows
q句把春天拟人化了,英文也用同样的结构就行。窗外:(x)out of the window.但是Q如果把“从H外q来”理解成一个过E,用through表示比较好?
人在屋子里坐不住Q就从门里出厅R?
so people——unable to bear staying inside any longer——go outdoors
破折号之间的形容词短语说明h们在屋里坐不住的原因。bearQ忍受,后面既可?ing动词Q也可跟不定式动词?
不过屋子外的春天太贱?
The spring outside, however, is much too cheap
q里的“贱”,是说春天多阳光,以多Q中外同理,用cheap也就理成章了?/P>
到处是阳?
for the sun shines on everything
q里和上一句是q接在一L(fng)Q所以用了连接词for来说明原因。最好不要译成the sunshine is everywhere.因ؓ(f)阛_q不是一U存在,而是说照耀在所有的一切上面,因此说shines.
不像破屋里阴深的那h?
and so does not seem as bright as that which shoots into the darkness of the house
用seem是指屋里屋外阛_是一L(fng)Q只是环境的反差佉K光显得不同Ş了。as……as是表C屋里屋外阳光的比较。that指the sun.
到处是给太阳晒得懒洋z的?
Outside the sun-slothed breeze blows everywhere
q里加了一个词outsideQ因为后面马上要说到的“屋里”ƈ不包括在“到处”一词里Q“晒”字英文里与之相当的词就是shineQ但是shineq没有带复合宾语的用法,所以换了一个角度来说这句话。sun-slothed是一个复合词?
不像搅动屋里沉闷的那h生气
but it is not so lively as that which stirs the gloominess inside the house
沉闷q个词在q里不是形容词,而是名词Q所以用gloomy加上词尾-ness构成了表C状态的名词?
是鸟语Q也g琐碎而单薄,需要屋里的寂静来做衬托?
Even the chirping of the birds sounds so thin and broken that the quietness of the house is needed to set it off
说thin and broken而不说broken and thin只是因ؓ(f)语音的关p,韌的词放在前面,多的攑֜后面Q结构上昑־q稳Q不至于头重脚轻。只要把q几个词q在一hM下就可体?x)出来?
我们因此明白Q春天是该镶嵌在H子里看的,好比画配了框子?
It seems that spring was always meant to be put behind a windowpane for show, just like a picture in a frame
“我们因此明白”译成It seems……,因ؓ(f)q是一U比ȝ说法Q直译成英文?x)给ZH兀的感觉,所以用“似乎如此”的说法。be meant to be的意思是“原本ؓ(f)……”,加了always{于从语气上与原文更相符合,q没有特别具体的含义。中文说“窗子里”,而英文却不能说in a windowpaneQwindowpane指的是窗子上的玻璃,q就是用behind的原因?
同时Q我们?zhn)刎ͼ门和H有不同的意?
At the same time it also becomes clear that the door has a different significance from the window
(zhn)到和上一句中的“明白”是相同的意思,it become clear that q一说法比it seems that 要肯定一些?
当然Q门是造了让h?
Of course, doors were made for people to pass through
可以译成to come out and go inQ但译成to pass through显得句子紧凑、精g些?
但是Q窗子有时也可作出口?
but a window can also sometimes serve as an entrance or as an exit
entrance和exitq两个词比door和window抽象化了Q充分表明了“进出口”的字面意思和含义?
譬如偷或小说里U约的情人就喜欢爬窗?
and is used as such by thieves and by lovers in novels
译文用了by thieves and by loversQ而不说by thieves and loversQ因本来是两类人,不能攑֜一hZ谈?
所以窗子和门的Ҏ(gu)分别Q决不仅是有没有来出?
In fact the fundamental difference between a door and a window has nothing to do with them being either entrances or exits
比较一下different between和前文的different QfromQ:(x)说两者之间的区别Q用different between A and BQ而说A怎样不同于B则说A is different from B.
若据赏春一事来看,我们不妨q样?
When it comes to the admiration of spring, it could be put this way
When it comes to是比较中庸的说法Q不那么正式Q但也不那么随意Q意思是“说赯春……”,让h们对下文有一个期待?
有了门,我们可以出去
a door makes it possible for one to go out
“有了门”不能译成with a/the doorQ因里不是说有还是没有,而是有门存在Qh们就可以q出房屋?
有了H,我们可以不必出去
whereas a window makes it possible for one not to have to
Whereas而……。这是一个连接词Q表CZU前后的比较或对照。这里的句型和上面是一L(fng)Q但是后面的not to have to 是不定式的否定Ş式,后面省略了go out.
H子打通了大自然和人的隔膜?
A window helps to pull down the partition between man and nature
“由于有了窗子,人和大自然之间的隔膜才得以打破”,H子L(fng)是一U促q作用,其本wƈ不能厠Z打破”什么,因此用了helps to pull down. partition隔离墙。“隔膜”是解剖学词汇,q里用的是其引申意义Q不能按字面译成diaphragmQ那h思就不对了。man and natureQman是指整个人类Q所以不用Q何冠词;nature则是不可数名词?
把风和太阳逗引q来Q屋子里也关着一部分春天
It leads breezes and sunlight in, and keeps part of the spring in the house
LeadQ引|引领。keep……in the houseQ停留在屋里不能外出?
让我们安坐了享受Q无需再到外面L?
It allows one to sit and enjoy the spring in peace, and makes it unnecessary to go looking for it outside
原文是说“安坐”,而实际上“安”的意思也应当能涵盖“n受”,只是从词的节奏上感觉“安坐”和“n受”都是两个字的词Q似乎是q列的。译文里译成?sit……in peaceQ等于将状语UM一个位。注意这句中几个it的含义,W一个it指代windowQ第二个it是Ş式宾语,引出后面的to go……,W三个it是指代the spring.
二、全通览Q?
HRandom Thoughts on the Window
又是春天Q窗子可以常开了。春天从H外q来Qh在屋子里坐不住,׃门里出去。不q屋子外的春天太׃Q到处是阛_Q不像射破屋里阴q那样明亮Q到处是l太x得懒z洋的风Q不像搅动屋里沉L(fng)那样有生气。就是鸟语,也似乎琐而单薄,需要屋里的寂静来做衬托。我们因此明白,春天是该镶嵌在窗子里看的Q好比画配了框子。
It is spring again and the window can be left open as often as one would like. As spring comes in through the windows, so people——unable to bear staying inside any longer——go outdoors. The spring outside, however, is much too cheap, for the sun shines on everything, and so does not seem as bright as that which shoots into the darkness of the house. Outside the sun-slothed breeze blows everywhere, but it is not so lively as that which stirs the gloominess inside the house. Even the chirping of the birds sounds so thin and broken that the quietness of the house is needed to set it off. It seems that spring was always meant to be put behind a windowpane for show, just like a picture in a frame.
同时Q我们?zhn)刎ͼ门和H有不同的意义。当Ӟ门是造了让h的。但是,H子有时也可作ؓ(f)q出口用Q譬如小h说里私U的情h喜Ƣ爬H子。所以窗子和门的Ҏ(gu)分别Q决不仅是有没有来出厅R若据赏春一事来看,我们不妨q样_(d)(x)有了门,我们可以出去Q有了窗Q我们可以不必出厅R窗子打通了大自然和人的隔膜Q把风和太阳逗引q来Q屋子里也关着一部分春天Q让我们安坐了n受,无需再到外面L。
At the same time it also becomes clear that the door has a different significance from the window. Of course, doors were made for people to pass through; but a window can also sometimes serve as an entrance or as an exit, and is used as such by thieves and by lovers in novels. In fact the fundamental difference between a door and a window has nothing to do with them being either entrances or exits. When it comes to the admiration of spring, it could be put this way: a door makes it possible for one to go out, whereas a window makes it possible for one not to have to. A window helps to pull down the partition between man and nature. It leads breezes and sunlight in, and keeps part of the spring in the house. It allows one to sit and enjoy the spring in peace, and makes it unnecessary to go looking for it outside.
来源Q互联网